Post 13

I had walked

these fields before

at that time

so very long ago

all the flowers

were just budding

all the promise of

all the beauty was

sealed in secrets

but I knew of them

without knowing them

as I walk these fields

when very long ago

has aged to now

those buds have bloomed

all the sealed secrets

now fall profusely

in silky satin petals

and I the bee nestle

within those floral revelations

Silver thistle dark

there is a valley

thick with silver thistles

that stretches between

February and October

the foliage glistens

under the light of 

twin full moons

one moon glows

from the light of you

the other moon reflects 

the beating of my heart

the sharp metallic leaves

hold their spines high

to stand guard of all

that will come to be

though I peer through them

and you peer back

they only allow 

a very limited view

but if we gaze upward

towards the moons above

you can dance to 

the rhythm of my heart

and I can find my way

through the silver thistle dark

to the light of you

 

Lapis dreams

I had a pretty good idea

for my expectations

the delivery date had

stated from day one

a certain time frame

so I was even and keel

with no anxious hopes

just smooth sailing 

until mid month

but then notice came

and the ship had sailed

or rather it had shipped

and with so many ships

coming into port

butterflies began to flutter

and it almost felt like

October three years on

but in Mercurial fashion

that is the Universe's humor

the only ship to come in

left dirt and snoring aids behind

Lives apart

any decision made

for your happiness

is a light in the darkness

for it is your joy

that will guide us together

a statue frozen in time

cannot call out

as a beacon in the night

love is my desire for you

to keep your flame alive

for love will not sever

love will not turn away

it will only set you adrift

on your course where

we will depart from 

our lives apart

but in the meantime...

 

Today's vistas

the ceiling fan

in the living room

was in competition

with the small windmill

in the neighbor's yard

just outside the side window

the backyard rabbit

I pretty much am 

keeping as a pet now

was gnawing on the

frozen carrots I tossed

to it from the veg drawer

I need to reset the temp

on the fridge I guess

the evening sunrays

cast the best silhouette

on the bedroom wall

from the nearby

planter of philodendron

the reflection in

the bathroom mirror

was easier to look at

as the effort of both 

diet and those damn

daily exercises seems

to actually be working

the clock on the dresser

near the closet door

still displays daylight

savings time because 

sometimes I just can't

be bothered to keep up 

with the rest of the world

Since finding you again

I've celebrated each day

even down to each hour

a petal to pull from the flower

knowing that love is the finality

I've found a way to make

an event to look forward to

for at least once each week

an event to commemorate us

and to intensify our gravity

I've searched among the stars

and have found our history

that points the way to our future

through each step of the sky

following the celestial giants

the reminders of our union

rain down upon our thirsty souls

I've listened to the prophets

that whisper within our hearts

to learn living in the what will be

will only erode what's meant to be

and staying in the here and now

will nourish the resolve of us

I've manifested what I can

for the time being that is

for through these hallowed items

the armor against fear I don

the shield against doubt I wield

 

Advances

not even two moons

have rolled by

yet how it's 

all changed from

reignition of what

was before to

recognition of what

can be the most mundane

actions adulterated with what

can be the most extraordinary

sensations and revelations

how the conversations

have permeated each

passing hour

and evolved into

ethereal touches to

hands and backs of necks

and the others at 

the most inopportune moments

yet savored nonetheless

Brigid's passing

laden with silence

this early February eve

sits in stillness

and emptiness

the tenderness of Imbolc

glows in the waning

of the Snow Moon

as Brigid's Cloak rests

on the arm of the chair

the fire that remains

in her passing

is an ember at this moment

as the moon it glows

in the hearth 

and as the germ in the seed

it patiently waits to ignite

burning as a beacon

for Venus's blessing

a fortnight away

but for now

the night is soft

the time is tender

the mood is gentle

and the lover waits

Balancing the scales

feeling the weight 

of your hand in my own

distraction is easily sown

while fantasy is rapidly grown

are you able to focus

is your job at risk

do you sleep at night

or are you always

waking up an hour

to thirty minutes before

your alarm is set

the pull is overwhelming

and dizzying at times

and the sighs

well they're just inevitable

is the new daydreaming discipline 

as challenging for you

for that and you have always

been my weakness...

and strength

 

Wedding night

gems have scattered

at the foot of the bed

silk sheets fall from 

the ceiling above

dim green lights dance

with flickering flames

flesh flows freely

over faux fur

breath collapses in

its competition with pulse

the duet of pleasure bows

giving way to the silence

and the wells of the eyes

Right here with me

you ask me not

to envision all

that is waiting for us

you ask me to hold off

just for now

so that destiny

can write itself

so that we might

have a little surprise

waiting for us

so we might just

get a "wow" in our hearts

instead of an "oh yeah"

I think you mostly

want me to stay

here in the present

instead of gallivanting

off into some unknown

future scenario where

I most likely will get lost

in all the possibilities

and if I'm right then

you probably are too

Surrender

you've found something

when your hand

glides up my right leg

when your fingertips slowly

find their way

from my ankle

along my shin

to the inner of my knee

it sends the most

melting sensation

to the rest of my body

my muscles want

to liquify in your palms

the signal travels

though my nerve pathways

surrendering any resistance

of the numerous points

for you to press

this one is my

white flag

 

Sourire

your smile

is truly the driving force

I will do anything

to see it

mountains and deserts

and long expanses

of prairie

won't keep me

from it

whatever I can do

to keep it

I will

to hear your laughter

even to the point of tears

truer music

I've never listened to

but even just 

that grin

that beams true

joy and contentment

let it reflect in my eyes

always

 

Lunar halo

under the pale light

in ten degree temps

neck arches back

to take it all in

the translucent layer

of cirrostratus

thin soft silk

laid across the face

of the ancient night

a few gems dare

to gleam and bask

in the mother moon

and her lunar halo

Quietude

if you have to

take a step back

I understand

this has been a lot

a tidal wave

of reacquaintance

of remembering

of exhausting intensity

and I know at times

we have to catch

our breath

I'm always up for

time on the couch

binge watching

whatever

and just laying

in your presence

if this gives you the chance

to regroup

then I'll hold your silence

and wait

Walks down the hall

riding the edge of tears

most days

but on a sea of laughter

and beauty

how the heart flows

in waterfalls from my chest

pooling at your feet

how the steam rises

from the heat of your

hand on my shoulder

this will be the longest

rising action of our story

from what has already

been set in motion 

on cold December nights

take my hand 

and we will take these

final steps together

into October nights

so much to do in

so little time, I almost

said it with a straight face

 

Afterwards

it's fascinating to me

that it won't be all 

of what we're going

through now

the ever-present

waiting and longing

the doubting of

our sanity

the mountains

of ecstasies

the valleys

of silence

no, none of this

will be significant

afterwards

it will be the shared

grins and glances

the knowing just

by looking into 

each other's eyes

the touch of hands

upon lips and cheeks

and every other inch

the laughter with

our loved ones

the tears that will

fall from time to time

in all these things there

will be no difference

Per your request

in the night hours

I gaze upward to find

the stars pointing to you

as zodiac numbers

add up the hours of my day

I pen what falls

from my heart

onto bare paper

from this winter window

I see snow and ice are

best companions to the cold

and wait for the warmth

of your words

knowing someday

you'll wrap me up

in love letters 

from your soul

January 25th take two

thirteen years ago

and a room full of poets

a night of anticipation

with me waiting for

someone I knew

but had never met

to take me by my

outstretched left hand

and lead me into

another life

and as the evening faded

that intention did as well

but seeds fell from that

faded bloom

and without knowing it

you had taken my hand

and my life was 

never the same 

Synchro city

I keep asking

and you seem to

keep giving

and I'm never

sure how much

gets over our

mental wall

but I rest in

knowing what

is said between

our souls

and how the

depths of that

appear eternal

as you tried to

explain it to me,

"your back has

opened up and

you are stretched

out of it, I don't

know how else

to explain it"

 

That moment

will they be able to

keep up with us

the reservoir we've 

been holding back

will release and the

ensuing flood will

wash away all the waiting 

our life will be almost

instantaneously how

we've always dreamt it

nothing will be the same

for us once we leave this moment

how long to savor the past

or surrender to the future

here in this most powerful present

 

I am with you

when the present becomes

the memory of our conversations

I'll be with you

in the moment our smiles

realize all of our past projections

I'll be with you

how many times we've constructed

our future interactions

how many times have we

remembered what our destiny will be

in all the dreams that bleed

into our everyday lives

I'll be with you

when we've played through

our last searching scenario

I am with you

Talaria steps

you're of my ruling planet

so does that mean you

were to rule my path

directing each step so

I may have no say

for you to slip the lead

around my neck and

take me where you may

and it seems perhaps

that is exactly what you did

almost as if you stole me

away from my own heart

and pointed me into the cold

but in many ways I was willing

that I must have agreed

to your guidance at some point

was it you that took my hand

that night we never kissed

jumping off of the page

I flipped to before it all

you hitchhiked for as long

as I allowed it all, though

I feel you may come and go

at times, now and then... still

Feast my eyes

I arrive at the restaurant

my heart overrides my nerves

as my mind is perplexed

about how calm I am

strange to be a party of one

as I've never gone out

to eat by myself, alone

that'll soon be remedied

the hostess leads me

into the dining room

and seats me with a menu

this list of food and drinks

will serve as my companion

but merely for the moment

for even as I sit down I feel

a magnetic force knocking

at my accelerating pulse

I resist for as long as I can

but then give in to the impulse

I glance up to find the most

intense gaze fixated on me

at that moment everything 

else fades from reality

as the ravenous connection

pulls at the very souls

of the two engaged in this

Countdown

just one thousand

three hundred sixty seven

of those twenty-four hours

rinse and repeat

the waking and sleep

for the next one hundred

and ninety five weeks

but that is the question

what to do with all the

forty four moons

passing between us

so many to juggle

on the path to you

some are just to wade through

while others will be

down right shit

but in the thirty two

thousand seven hundred

and eighty eight hours

we will live our lives

until it becomes our life

and I wish you the best one

for the next three years

eight months and 

twenty eight days

 

Occupation

he looks down upon

the passing seasons

from his position 

in the tower five up

his chamber is built

in the nervous system

where brains both

come and leave

the tower five up

is situated in a large

expanse of verdant green

and he looks up to

watch the giant dragonflies

zoom by holding lives

in their hands

the five up in the tower

is not the only five up

he holds dear to him

five up from his own day

he has climbed

on the ladder of moons

to find the other

he has called to 

and has heard called

from the tower five up

to raptor wings and beyond

Love thyself

you ask me

to love myself

through you

to use you as

a mirror

and undress

for me to look

at the flowing

curves running

up and down my

torso and legs

to see the varied

hues of pigment

that has come from

generations of lovers

entwining their genes

to give me this flesh

you ask me to look

at the constellations

scattered across my skin

stars that help you

navigate to my heart

you ask me to look

at the scars that glimmer

reflecting those past

lessons learned hard

in this you light a candle

to help guide me

across the bridge

from my heart to my self

Libra

your scales 

balance me

I thought your

stars were mine

but gave them back

to you when I 

realized my mistake

you may take mine

when twins ride bulls

but I want it known

I give them to you

with all the joy

found in the heavens

though you offer me

the world and anything

the thing I want the most

is you as my world

so I'll tip your scales

just for the time being

so as with sails full of air

to point you Starboard

and to home with me

 

 

Standing by

do we feel as statues

these stands of stone

carved by an outside force

draped in time and patience

having been chipped away

through the drifting years

to reveal the within

what we may have hid

what we may have held

to keep ourselves whole

in lives that were shattered

do we feel as statues

with unblinking eyes

upon the swirling spheres

waiting for alignment

not of any stars or heavenly bodies

but of our own bodies and souls

of our own heart and spirit

to claim the reason for our births

and realize the cost of our deaths

Will be

"all the could bes

that torment you at night

are not near as strong

as the will be"

you whisper this

to me so I can sleep

but it's my dreams

or the lack of them

that cause the insomnia

I rest in the thought of you

yet the thought of you

stirs me from sleep

the fear that if I fall

asleep with you

will I wake up 

without you...

and you whisper again

 

In restlessness

amorous waves lapped

our tangled bodies

while sheets twisted

in the wind of our desire

our serpentine limbs

danced in an emerald haze

and we were lost to

the late night hours

our lips slowly chanted

the song emanating from

our heaving chests

eternity could have

passed us by unaware

as your hand brushed

my cheek and trickled

down my neck

your arm cradled

my chest from behind

and we fell asleep

with your breath

whispering in my ear

Venus rules

in tourmaline fields

I search for you

with aid of raven calls

my voice is carried

to your heart

down spiral stairs

my feet carry me deep

into a forgotten chamber

the walls pulsate with

your drum and ebb and

flow with the rhythm 

of your holy breath

in these depths and

candlelight views

I discover you reading

you look up suddenly

I catch your glance

and throw it back to you

everything falls silent

and still and in this

the moment Venus has

blessed our tether

you take my hand in yours

and kiss my temple

 

Sunday nights in January

what if we decide

to go a day early

or that a day early

isn't early enough

from a coincidental

meeting at the curb

to an intentional

sought out contact

with table and chairs

from morning light

to best lit faces in

dim bulbs and candles

what if we decide

to throw it all away

every version we've

indulged ourselves in

and just say fuck it

toss a coin and let it

land on come what may

because no matter if

it's nearing Halloween

or falling on some other

significant date and time

all the signs we've known

all of those we've cherished

are ornaments to this

what's said between us

just remnants of our hope

that we crave on cold

Sunday nights in January

 

The last leg

some three

and three

quarters 

from now

dangling meat

before our eyes

the chaos

that spills

from the

oracle's lips

feel so

illiterate trying

to read these

tea leaves

but with a

good book

and tin 

of Dansk

some three

and three 

quarters 

from now

will be now

in no time

Overlaps

the whispers to

you at midnight

the moments you

steal from him

the glances I 

steal from you

the fibs I tell so

I can meet you

again and again

the tug of war

you both play

with my soul

the choice I made

the path we took

the body we share

just for the moment

the fate I take back

in Jupiter's glare

the flight I'll make

the dreams you'll have

some mid October

 

On the look out

I watch for you

searching for me

you finally see me

looking for you

but I try not to look

at you watching me

your gaze is too heavy

and I cannot look away

so I meet your eyes

as you draw closer without blinking

I look down at the chair next to me

you take a seat and say,

"You look like you are looking for someone." 

I reply, "I was."

Gifting tune

green stars that

shine in your 

reflection

red moons that

roll in my

direction

these rings that

swirl around

our fingers

this song that

stays around

and lingers

 

Who are you waiting for

I know him

without ever 

meeting him

I know him 

without any

memories of him

it's like his

essence is

embedded within

my own

like whispers

being made

between our

molecules

I have never

seen him,

physically

yet I have seen

every part

of him

We may have to be distant right now

found a blank

thinking of you

card today

the emptiness of it

was deafening

wanted to fill

it up with you

with thoughts of you

with want of you

with all the words

I have yet to

say to you

and after the space

is filled to capacity

I would offer it

to the giants glowing

in the night sky

for them to take the now

and bring about 

what will be

 

Tempering

the fire offers its warmth

and light in this cold night

though it struggles to find

the strength to ignite with

cold and damp fuel to feed

smooth smoke wafts up

over the fence into the drive

it sinks slowly into the glow

of the side door's lantern

the heated energy drifting

down the shadowy street

as Orion reclines in the east

Venus peers through the trees

incense from the spruce twigs

settles on the dormant grass

and wonder pauses for now

to breathe in the moment

under the weight of this fate

Beating drums

scramble to write down

dates to try to make sense

out of the beating drums

when they didn't beat

so well at night's beginning

when the dance was

exhausting when the

drummers needed to

remember the electro

magnetic frequency

of this spinning world

but counted out the

second of the fourth

of the two thousand 

and twenty second

to the eve of Christmas

that same turn

to the second of the fifth

of the two thousand

and twenty fifth

had we finally had enough

just enough to make

all your friends speechless

when you introduce me

yeah, let's dance 

to our own drum

 

Gems

I dreamt of

dreaming of you

just knowing

that you had

been in my dreams

made my heart

skip a beat

it was as though

we had taken 

the next step

that you were in

a place other than

our waking dreams

you had walked

though the wall

of my psyche

into a place where

I could hold you safe

could hold you close

this dream of

dreaming of you

is an emerald for me

and a ruby for you

Closest

this rising smoke

an incantation 

under the alignment

of closeness

in this us being

closest to the sun

and the moon

being closest to us

I invoke gravity

to pull us closest

in this a shower

of heavenly bodies

soaring to their fates

I invoke Luvehi

to pull us closest

rising incense calls

through the night

to pull us closest

and hold us tight

 

Excessus

your arms slide

underneath mine

from behind

your breath is

heavy on my neck

my heart ticks

with the beat

of prey before

the predator

the beat slowly

melts into your

tidal motion

two beings ebbing

and flowing together

as my neck

arches backwards

and your lips

glide down it

to pool on my

eager shoulder

I surrender

to your will

as you hold me

within your chest

we are lost in 

this moment

in each other

2029

how long to savor

that moment

how long to stay

in that moment

the moment we 

always return to

a soft word spoken

a glance taken

finger glides across

back of hand

reply and nod

eyes in awe

stuttering lips

disbelief melts

into recognition

and then...

how long to keep

that moment within

how long to wait

for that moment

the moment we

always long for